Coming to an End

by Alaysia Corley


I always think I have myself figured out and realize there is always a deeper part of myself that I don’t understand. Living with a group of people I have learned more about  myself in this specific environment. I always thought of my self to possess certain qualities and realized during the internship that some of these qualities didn’t show more than others. I believed that around other people I was extroverted, loud, and talkative. Apparently with a large group of people I am the opposite of those qualities. One of the interns came up to me and expressed how they felt they knew me the least within the group. After they said that I reflected on my time in the internship and realized that it was true. I didn’t open up to many of the interns and there were times where I didn’t hang out with the group. Among this realization I also found out about the negative qualities that I possess. The reason for my lack of receptiveness was due to my negative qualities. I came to the conclusion one night that it was time for me to change. I noticed a pattern in my behavior and wasn’t happy with it. Although I am an introverted person, my reasons for not participating in group events wasn’t because I needed time alone, but due to fear of being open to strangers and change.

Care groups is one of the many activities that I have enjoyed so far. Care groups are ran by Wilkens Avenue Mennonite Church and they gather a few adults around the neighborhood pray about issues they are experiencing. The BUP students have had the privilege to join some of the care groups every Tuesday night. I was surprised that we were invited to participate with the groups due to the age difference. Most of the problems that are shared I feel that most adults wouldn’t want to share with college students. Especially students who are only around for a temporary amount of time. I appreciated the adults in the care groups for opening up to us. It helped us in understanding the importance of unity and support. Hearing some of the problems that people in my group were facing, I concluded I was able to relate to some of them (specifically family related). There were some problems shared where all I could express was excess silence. Even though everyone is going to have a different life experience I think these care groups were a good way to understand adulthood since most of us are approaching that stage of life.

Last weekend I went to the African American History and Culture Museum. I recently came back from abroad and felt that during my four months in Italy I was disconnected with my culture. So the museum was a good experience for me. The museum had an exhibit of moving images from the Freddie Gray protest. So all I want to say is that #blacklivesmatter.

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